….someone can hide the darkest and sadest stories.
I have been away for a week to a lovely warm and sunny Crete in Greece and had such happy moments that cannot be described. When I came there I was so stressed, suffered from insomnia and were totally full of worries in my head every single night and day.
The first nights we came down I had tons of bad dreams, nightmares and I couldn't understand why I now on vacation had nightmares? In this beautiful paradise?
After 3 days the nightmares were gone, I was filled with a warm fussy feeling of joy, love and happiness and no stress. Even if I did some work down there I didn't feel any stress…
Yesterday when I knew I was heading home that stress came back. Anxiety, nervousness and my insomnia. Again, I lied awake half night and then nightmares the rest of the night…
And now I´m home and already stressed again with all those things many of us worries about every day. Bills, money, leaving our kids long days in kindergarden/school due to our working hours/studies and so on. We all have our own little "hells" to live day by day and even if not every day is filled with stress or darker sides they will be there from time to time during the life we live here on this Earth.
When I heard about Robin Williams tragic suicide and depression I felt the typical sadness that a person can be like a clown - happy face on the outside but so dark and sad on the inside. And it´s always shocking to many to see a seemingly happy person falling down in to a depression. The happy one that always were the one to make jokes and making others happy suddenly is the one that never laughs, that has such sadness and emptiness in the eyes and no matter how you try to help the person can't get up.
I´ve been in a dark period myself where I really didn't see any light anymore. Where life had made me filled with darkness and the happy person I was and is by nature, was just gone. People around me who knew me couldn't understand who I was anymore and it took a long time to get out of the darkness and step into the light again and getting the will to continue living and walking this earth for some years more.
When I think about how many there is that we believe have "everything" - fame, money, love, beautiful children and so on - but in truth they are so miserable, depressed and filled with anxiety about life that they do not show anyone, it makes me so sad. That we can't help, that they just can't get out of the dark spot and get back to us in time before its to late. That they are lost forever. Lovely people who really left us to early due to that darkness… It saddens me and I wish that if anyone out there feeling they are in that dark dark place and need help - please talk to someone. Don´t feel ashamed to seek help. There are great medicines, therapies and most of all - people who CAN help! Let others help you to get out into the LIGHT. Depression is a really hard thing to struggle with by yourself.
Robin Williams - you were such an amazing person in all your lovely characters in TV and the big screen and I will surely miss you in this world.
R.I.P. Robin Williams