Monday, January 30, 2017

Writing and writing

Hey all and happy Monday!

Hope all is well with all of you=) I am doing school work mostly at home this semester since I am writing my bachelor exam and I´ve chosen a subject I love, namely music. Actually music therapy.

I took a course last year about Music therapy and it was such an interesting and inspiring thing to get to know more about how music, that I love, can be used when working with people with for example dementia. So I didn´t hesitate when choosing my exam subject but am writing about just that.

I have chosen to write alone since I love to write and I dont like to be bonded to someone else and their schedules and since I have a family it works better for me to write alone. This way I can plan and execute my days and evenings as I choose.

The first thing we do is to do a project plan for the essay and this is during 5 weeks and I am now in the third week so I have written quie a lot already. Then we go into 10 weeks of writing the main essay and it will be lots of work but since I really am interested in the subject it doesnt feel as a burden.

When it comes to my album with Jani he has been on tour for some weeks but are home now so I am awaiting some more demos to record hopefully this weekend=)

This year I feel will be a very positive year for me, in so many ways. You know when you just feel that in the body? Last year was not so fun so I do believe in cycles and this year will for sure be better, I hope=)

Lots of love

Friday, January 20, 2017

Strong outside but weak inside

Hey sweeties and happy Friday!

I want to write about some serious stuff today, I know it isn´t always so fun but sometimes we need to allow the weaker things inside of us to come out. We can still be strong and look strong but in the inside we may be weak and not showing.

As most of you probably know I was robbed and beaten badly last year in february by a drug junkie. Last week it was finally time for me to face her in court, a moment I´ve dreaded for and been scared for. I´ve never been in a court before so the whole thing felt so scary after seeing all those dramatic american lawyer series.

I had mum and Johan with me and also my lawyer and one of the many heroes from that day, Antonia, who chased after her and tried to take back my bag and also got beaten.

It felt scary and weird to sit there facing the person who without any thought started beating me badly in my face that day, many times, while I was lying down on the ground defenceless. To tell to the court and those being there to see the hearing, my story and breaking down and crying when I told I feared for my life and has been scared to walk the streets ever since and have bad nightmares that haunt me still, was hard but had to be done.

Now after the hearing I have even worse nightmares and I am awaiting what the outcome will be, if she´ll be in prison or not. I hope for her sake and others that she will be locked away and hopefully come out from the drug abuse since it will for sure otherwise kill her.

I feel empathy for her but I also am angry since she has messed me up and I still have headaches on the side she beated me. 

What it also did was stur up an old trauma from a thing that happened me when I was 18 years old and also got attacked. I have never talked about this in public but it´s a horrible thing that changed my life and still is with me every single day.

To be attacked twice in life has made me wonder why this happens to me, but there are just no single solution to that and I cant go thinking about that cause life happens for a reason we do not know why.

I just want all of you, especially women and girls to be careful out there. If you walk alone please do not walk in dark places, be careful when someone walks close behind you, when you meet someone that looks suspicious, scream for help if you get attacked!!! That made Antonia hear me and come to the rescue and helped me get this person to the court. 

Know that there are dangerous people out there, dont be AFRAID but be CAREFUL at all times.

Love and light,

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Latest outfits=)

Hey all!

Hope you have a blessed day! I love that the sunlight has returned and it make me wanna wear spring clothes so I have started doing so by using lighter colored jeans and bought myself some new spring blouses from H&M. 

It´s a bit of the 80s in the fashion now and well I LOVE the 80s so I go all in and puff my hair up in a side hair do with some spray, put on some crazy glasses and wear high waisted jeans, voluminous tops and color! Go all in=)

1. Jeans and blouse from H&M (in stores now)
2. shoes ZARA
3. socks and scarf from
4. glasses are old from H&M

1. Blouse and knit from GINA TRICOT (in stores now)
2. jeans from TWO WOMEN IN THE WORLD
3. shoes ZARA

 1. jeans from ASOS
2. blouse and leo heels from H&M
3. top from RAGDOLL
4. socks from studio stilista
5. glasses from MIU MIU

Saturday, January 14, 2017

Hey all=)

Hi all and finally christmas and all it´s lazy days are done=) 

I am so happy to start 2017 and especially since this year is the YEAR me and Jani Liimatainen will release our album!=) 

Just got a rough demo with my lead vocals on one of the faster songs and damn, I love to sing more "metal" and power metal=)
I sure long for you to hear this!

Love and light and be careful and enjoy this weekend!