Hi my dear ones;=)
Last night I woke up several times, looking up in the ceiling, having heavy thoughts in my head.
Ever since I was a child I´ve wanted justice and have always hated injustices. Therefore I am at a road block at the moment. I´ve been injustified and even if I would love to leave it behind me, I can´t, cause it´s to much at stake for me.
So today I am taking a BIG decision:
Battle or not?
Hard thoughts but I am sure I will feel better when this days decision is made;=)
To clear my thoughts I´m gonna do a great exercise, drink lots of coffee, write some more lyrics and think of all the joy my family and friends give me;=)
Enjoy this day and lots of love!
35 comments:
Hard to offer any advice when I have no idea what happened or the circumstances in which whatever incident or incidents occurred in, or even the nature of it or the implications of taking action or not taking action.
I digress though, if this is over potential legal matters, those which may possibly end up being very public, could be potentially damaging, even if you are right. I saw low lifes willing to defend Tim Lambesis (innocent until proven guilty), saying that his estranged wife 'deserved it', so my advice if it is something potentially of this nature is to way up the potential negatives of tacking it on with the positives and the positives and negatives of leaving it be, unfortunately being someone with notoriety this isn't the same as someone screwing me over. Either way, love and support for whatever the situation is, and whatever action you decide to take, you sure as hell helped me a lot when I was stuck in a pretty shitty situation.
Take care hun, love from Australia
Xoxo
Yes injustice is a very bad thing. And I have some thoughts like that sometimes in my head too. I leave it behind for now but I never know what I do if I see some people again, because I get a stronger psyche and I think I would love to show that some people . At the other side things are over and it hurts to touch in old, almost healed wounds. my tip is: do what your heart says, maybe it will hurt forever if you dont fight. or like in my chase the pain got weaker and it is possible to live with it. Be careful when you take this decision. Wish you the best for it.
Love Saskia
PS: the reason for not commenting for so long was that I had exams and much to learn, but now I am ready (best student of the grade) and I will comment more now.
Hi Anette,
I'm sure you'll make the right decision with your sense of justice and the fact that you're just a great person!!
By the way, I'm a fan of yours from Italy and have been following and reading your blogs for months. I love it :D I can't wait to hear your new songs (and in the meanwhile, I listen to your old ones!) and also to see on your blog/stor if I can get something from you ;) that would be great!
Battle. Don't EVER let someone injustify you. After all, you are pippi longstocking, the stubborn Swedish girl who always stands up for her rights. ;-)
I'm not sure what is going on, but I hope you do stand up for your self and feel better about the situation. Love and hugs!
Are you talking about NW? I would understand it. I think they treated you wrong and very bad.
But no matter what you´re talking about, get up and fight. No-one has the right to injustify somebody.
You know that we all support you.
Depends how big the injustice was! I think, for me the important would be to confront the people that was injust for me and find out why. But not for the sake of having a battle.
I´ve just gone through an incident where I felt that injustice was done to me and I definitely decided to battle it out. Often staying silent and letting things go would be the easier choice but I know I would regret it later. So I play Stand Up and Fight by Turisas to get into battle mode :)
Good luck, whatever choice you decide to make
well you can always convert those feelings/thoughts into lyrics right? it might bring you relief
well you can always convert those feelings/thoughts into lyrics right? it might bring you relief:)
Hei Anette,
Big hugs for you're night !! Is not really cool that !!
I agree with you, we must fight against this injustice! There in that as its the world will change! More people will like you and the world we live we will become better!
I think you can feel good that is in agreement with yourself!
Injustice is a recurring evil in this world and when a person is fighting against, it is always a lucid person and someone who can make a difference by raising his entourage! Is that like her we could get out of this problem! By fighting for what is right and good and not for evil!
This is good because you Défender so for my part, I advise you to "take up arms" and to fight against!
I also think you can not decide not to fight against! When defending a cause, no matter which, even if we decide to give up by what is tired, you can always find the strength somewhere, "the rage" this fight again for what we believe be fair! And your cause and just as you know, so do not hesitate!
Have a good exercices time ! I hope I've help you and you're exercices too
With Love <3
Kisses & Hugs
I'm sorry to hear that you have been injustified, my dear. You are one of the nicest persons I can imagine so I don't understand why anyone should treat you badly.
Unfortunately some people hate others for just being themselves and being nice, loved and successful. Maybe such a behaviour is just because of jealousy...
I can understand what you said about leaving this behind. I'm sure you really want to leave it behind. I know that several years can pass and still a person can suffer from the injustices happened to him/her.
About the question "battle or not?" my advice would be to consider if the battle would be useful. I wouldn't want to take a useless fight because all you get from this is frustration. But if there is even th smallest chance to change anything I would suggest to fight back.
Hope this can help you with the decision and maybe you want to tell us more about it when the decision is made.
And never forget, sweet Nettie: your blog followers will always love you no matter what others say.
I wish you all the best and lots of love. Kisses and hugs,
Steffi <3
Well, people often face dilemmas and sometimes it’s more difficult making the decision itself than facing its consequences. As I don’t know exactly what’s happened to you (something about family, career or school maybe?) I can’t tell you specific things but I have a golden rule, which is actually one of my favorite quotes. It says: Don’t make promises when you’re happy and don’t make decisions when you’re angry.
As for me, I’m very sensitive when it comes to this topic. I always hated injustices because I saw everything objectively. And still I’d rather cry when something unfair is happening than when I feel hurt. I may take everything too objectively and that’s why people say I’m cold and I don’t have any empathy.
When I have to decide between two options I often analyze them before I make a decision. I make lists in my head about the advantages and disadvantages they have. The bad thing about it is that I’m inclined to think too much about them. And I realize that I’m doing something totally else meanwhile I keep telling myself these advantages and disadvantages. And this affects my everyday life in a bad way.
Most of the time one of the options means an easier and more comfortable way but bad influence in the long run. The other option means a hard way but with a good result in the long run. And here’s the dilemma. Should I take it easy and then suffer the consequences and hear the guilty conscience, which keeps telling me that I was too lazy and I didn’t do everything to reach my goals? Or should I work hard and suffer from choosing the difficult way to do my best? (As for me, it’s the first one I often choose.)
Maybe because your problem is about injustice, it includes other people who were mean to you. Then I advise not to make your decision until you’re angry. You might regret it. I don’t think you’re like that but I tell you this because it’s happened to me many times. In such a case you should calm down yourself and think about the whole thing from farther away. Like you’d be an outsider or you’d watch it from the future. My dear teacher used to say: Make the decision while imaging you’re Jesus. Although I’m not religious this method can help a lot.
I know when you’re angry you feel like killing the entire mankind but sometimes you have to tolerate others cruelty because then it’s better to everybody. When your mind is not clear you don’t take this into account. But there’s a limit to everything. If the same person hurts you again and again or if somebody is so cruel to you that nobody could tolerate you should take action. No one should treat others as cruel as sometimes they do.
Now I feel like groping in the dark. I can’t tell you any useful things because I don’t know the details but you have to know that we support you whatever happened or happens. =)
Good luck on making the decision,
Dalma
Fight! You seems to be a person who fight for whats seems fair to you so stay yourself and battle!
In my dream justice always win so lets hope you'll win too. No one deserve injustice.
Lots of love to you my dear
it sounds like you are already battling it. if it is causing you so much stress then it is an issue that needs to be dealt with. with that in mind do "what ifs"..eg what if you didn't fight, what would happen? or what if you did fight but lose?
i'm going through a battle of my own. remember my emotional hell? well cause of that stress my doctor put me on esa (sick pay) and told me not to work. the company that assess people to make sure claims are genuine has said i'm fit for work. so they promptly stopped my benefits (good job i managed to save some money). but i've been progressively getting worse as i wait for treatment. so i'm appealing with the help of an advocate. i feel i haven't been listened too at all and because my illness is mental and not physical i find it discriminating...i don't need this added stress but i'm not going to let them walk over me. most of my life i've faced discrimination...as a baby cause my uncle kev was disabled, as a teen when i came out as a lesbian, late teens at work because i was bisexual (cause of that i stick to telling people i'm a lesbian) and through out my teens to this day discriminated on grounds of mental health...i remember a teacher who forced me to show my scars (from selfharming) and i didn't fight...that abuse of trust still hurts and to this day i still haven't spoken to her. even just saying hi in the street i just can't bring myself to do it. i'm scared it'll come out as anger..i don't want to be like that and hurt others how i've been hurt.
at the end of the day it is your choice and you have to live with the consequences of your actions.
Hi Anette,
Well, it's hard to offer any advice since I don't know what happened ... but I think you should just get up and fight! Don't let anyone bring you down ;).
Much love from Portugal <3
I say battle! Whoever did that thing to you needs to learn that it was a big mistake. You can't let people mess with you because they are going to do it again. So show'em lady :)
One thing I learned in life is to "choose your battles." Sometimes things are simply not worth fighting for. Is a fight really worth pursuit if it damages a relationship? What if it hurts you or your career? Sometimes people get a bad reputation for "stirring the pot," even if they are right, they can be labelled as high maintenance. I would weigh all possible outcomes and repercussions, then decide. Hope for the best in any situation, but always prepare for the worst. Sometimes holding your head high and turning the other cheek is the best revenge you could give: Bullies hate when they have no effect on their victims.
Hey Dearest,
I don't know what happened to you but as long as your fight harms nobody in any way, it is alright. :)
I send strength to you!
Love and hugs,
Eva
Hello Anette,
The world is full of injustice and hard decisions. It was only later, sometimes you think different about his decisions. It can be seen also that one would have to go another way.
I am also sometimes gone the wrong way and have not regretted it. But because you learn this and learned you never forget. That is life.
In recent weeks I was haunted by the chef, which I wanted to do an apprenticeship as a chef, followed.
He was an egoist and I was more than just being bullied. I should pick up once the tables for the patio from the ground and the shy, the journeyman would help me. After an hour he came and yelled at me why I need you so long, but he had not told the fellow that he should help me. But sent him home. Everyone else would do it in a Half Hour. Now I knew what I had told him on the head. But then I was just tired and my Ahstma had made bad noticeable. And these tables were so heavy and the stairs was not very wide.
Since it was a real right decision to cancel the training and to free me from hell.
At that time I pulled the ripcord and I do not regret it.
A little story from me to my decision. Meanwhile, I forgive the guy. It is like he is and what he did to me to fall back on him one day.
And I think your decision about Nightwish brave. This courage you will also in this decision. As I'm sure;).
All the best Nalon.
Hi Anette!
After reading this particular blog post, I have a feeling that you are going to talk about your departure with Nightwish again. If I’m right about this, I would really like to ask you not to do it please. It’s almost 10 months now since the split, I can see that both you and the band are happy at the moment – you with Mio on board and creating new songs, and the band with doing the festival shows −, and talking about the departure would just cause some war in the fanbase again, which is really not needed. I hope my gut feeling is wrong, and you are talking about another thing in this post.
Regards,
-D
If you can fight without hurting yourself in the long run, it may be worth it. Next to the injustice, not doing anything when you possibly could can hurt just as much.
Do what feels right to you, you deserve better!
Somethimes taking up a battle causes more stress than it actually benefits. On the other hand if you feel unjustifed and cannot even sleep due to the situation, it is an issue which will not just fade away and must be dealth with. Isn't there a solution that is somewhere in between? Could you try mediation maybe?
I wish you strength and am sending you tons of positive energy to support you on your way to resolve the issue.
Hmm... going off what you say when you comment you can't put it behind you as there is too much at stake for you I might say battle.
Though it's tricky to offer advice when I don't know the situation.
What I would say though is that if you do choose to battle then be careful Anette.
Have a nice evening! :-)
I hope Nightwish isn't trying to hold back royalties from you. That would be a battle you should fight in my opinion. But whatever your injustice is, I know you will do what is best. You know we all here for you and support you in your battle. We love you Anette remember that.
Love,
Linda
Will battling help one leave things behind? From my experiences, it highly depends on the battle.
If it's a battle to get revenge for something or a relief for hurt feelings, it will come around again and again. No one will ever be satisfacted, not even if the justice is done. The hurt pride and/or feelings won't be mended, quite the opposite; the scars will rip open for no avail.
Things tend to get dirty and innocent bystanders on both sides will get involved and hurt in the process.
If it's a matter of getting justice on universal level, as in "everyone should have the right to", one can't really make a change alone and can easily be targeted by the "enemy". It is a bitter road to fight alone so one should get others with similar experiences for back up. :)
Even if the justice won't be done, letting one's anger out loud and having a supporting group might relief the anxiety.
The downside is, piling up the anger with others won't let you leave anything behind. As with the revenge, it can turn to a center point of one's life.
Then there's battles with institutes. These have the highest success rate and it's also safe. They have to have pleas and such to their actions and decisions, and those have to be written down. So a private person has one huge supporter on their side, the legal system.
Also it's a private matter, so no harm done to other aspects in one's life.
The people on the "enemy side" are humans too, they do errors and bad decisions in their work. There are very few of those people who actually want to make others miserable, so for me it's nice to know that people with normal social behavior can go on with their personal life once they shut the door at 5 PM.
If that's not the way one wants to handle things, we go back to section 1: personal revenge. And that leads to nowhere.
Then again, there can be assholes within institutes or companies. Full steam ahead, rip them all down. :D
What ever your issue and decision regarding it is, I wish you strength and luck. :)
Many and also wise thoughts here. I don't know.... If the issue really disturbes you , you have to do something about it .
We have only one life here, and we want to make it the best we can . Is this an issue you will regret later in life not to have battled?
The battle won't make you a lesser person . You are precious, you are proud of yourself, you are a mother, and you are a beautiful person. Fight if you have to. Think of a way to do it wisely. It is your life Anette ! Good luck with your decision, and we will be on your side :)
Hi Anette!
I agree with Pikkumyy 1990. If it is about NW, please don´t fight.. It isn´t good for you or them or to us fans!
I´m very excited to hear your new songs! Do you have a record deal yet?
Have a happy summer!
Mari
Battle. Being silent to injustice is the same of supporting it, doesn't matter the situation. If you have proof, then you are backed up and have nothing to loose if you fight.
You are a strong woman, loved by your friends and family and also by your fans and readers.
Take care and have a great week.
I say FIGHT!
Like we're doing here in Brazil! ;D
All the best for you, Nettan ^^
Hello Anette, can import the reason of your decision, if you are in your rights, then refuse and resists !
Good luck Anette and is strong, your fans are with you.
EMMANUEL (FRANCE)
Since I'm not quite sure which injustice you speak of, I can't give solid advice. Only that, you should REALLY think through anything before you do it. Especially if it's something that would become public. Sometimes, when public "justice" is sought, it causes a huge backfire to the one seeking the justice (which can be fair or unfair, depending on why, who, etc,.) and everyone will certainly put their own opinions out there.
If it is something that after given proper time to meditate on, can be forgiven and let slide for both parties to move-on, then that is always the better route.
I have found that anything said or done out of anger, only causes me problems. But if I wait to handle it when I'm calmer, I have time to think about what to say, and what not to say, and usually the other person is more understanding.
I hope you make the right decision on this. Best of luck!
I don't know what this is about, but if it *is* about NW, and they've truly done something unfair, like holding back royalties, screw the "fan's feelings." Please. That's just selfish when "fans" complain it would start "fights." You're one kick-ass momma, a hell of a singer, and a genuinely sweet lady, and I KNOW you wouldn't fight for something unless it was truly the right thing. Don't let people walk all over you!
And if it's totally unrelated to NW, cool. I'm not a war-monger. I just want to see you do what's right. Whoever's doing this, go get 'em!
If there is so much at stake, I say go for whatever it is! If it IS a public thing, I'm pretty sure you'd agree, your name has been drug through the mud quite enough for you to know how that goes. I don't think that's anything new for you or anyone who supports you. You need to do whatever it is that you need to do.
If this isn't public and it's just something you can't put down - my brother has the same problems sometimes. Sometimes I tell him that he needs to move on from things because he gets stuck trying to figure them out, to the point that it causes him problems, or sucks up all of his time and positive energy.
Whatever you decide to do, you will always have supporters!
Go pippi go! :)
-Desi from Missouri
Annette, I don't know what your injustice pertains to, but I read an inspirational quote the other day: "Don't attend every argument you're invited to", meaning that if somebody is very angry and hateful and wants to hurt you, just ignore this person. It is not your anger and darkness to share. :)
Hope that helps.
xxx
I would say you need to battle. My daughter was done an injustice earlier this year. She went through a horrific incident while in the care of her father. I fought for her safety and protection, hoping and praying the law would be in her favor. She was served an injustice when the judge said that she had to go back to visiting her father. I still continue to fight for her justice since I am her voice. Whatever your injustice may be, even if you don't get justice, you can feel good about battling for it.
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